Day 23 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - REACTIONS DIMENSION part 3

Self-Corrective Statements/Self Commitment.

I commit myself to taking responsibility to me for me through self writing, reading and not take this commitment of me for me as boring and hence end up creating reactions of boredom and apathy, from within this as well, I commit myself to not use the boredom that I generate as a reaction of not taking responsibility for me as an excuse to entertain myself through watching TV/movies or surfing the net. I commit myself to assisting and supporting myself to seeing realizing and understanding that by connecting the thought of seeing tasks like self writing/blogging, chores as difficult, time consuming and or boring triggers within me the reactions of boredom and lack of interest/apathy towards the fulfillment of my daily requirements/responsibilities.

 

I commit myself to when and as I am aware that I am or I am about to participate within energy generated within and as the relationship of my thoughts, imaginations and or backchats as well as reaction I shall breath and stop myself from participating within energy and from within this, I commit myself to assist and support myself to see realize and understand that participating within energy is a way that my mind uses to get more energy for itself and I generate this energy for my mind through participation and hence end up sabotaging responsibility of me towards me by dwelling in mind energy and wasting time, time I would have used to do real physical practical activities like self writing, house chores in order to stand from laziness into a self disciplines consistent person.

 

I commit myself to stop myself from participating within the polarity game of positive and or negative energetic reactions/experiences of boredom and apathy which I have created through thoughts, imaginations and or backchats towards self responsibility or enthusiasm/excitement which I regard as positive energetic reaction/experience towards entertainment, from within this, I commit myself to when I am aware that I am or I am about to participate within and as reactions as positive/negative energy, I shall breath and stop myself from any participation.

I commit myself to whenever I see myself connecting the thought of seeing myself seated on the couch watching TV to the positive energetic reaction/experience of enthusiasm/excitement which I then embody as myself, I shall breath and stop myself from participating within this thought for a see, realize and understand that this is just a way that my mind gets me to generate more energy for its survival and that who I am is not an energetic experience but a real physical living being in and as my physical body.

I commit myself to assist and support myself see realize and understand that I abdicate/sabotage responsibility towards myself through using the excuses of boredom and apathy reactions by regarding self responsibility for me through writing/blogging, reading, chores as difficult, time consuming and or boring.

 

Day 22 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - REACTIONS DIMENSION (Self-Forgiveness) part 2

Self-Forgiveness Statements:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regard the responsibility towards me in and as self writing/chores/blogging as boring and hence create the reactions of boredom, which I then experience as the energetic experience of boredom and from within boredom I then use it as an excuse to entertain myself through watching TV/movies, surfing the net etc. I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that by connecting the thought of seeing tasks like self writing, chores, blogging as difficult, time consuming and or boring triggers within me the reactions of boredom and lack of interest/apathy towards the fulfillment of this tasks/chores from within which I experience the energies or boredom and apathy as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a relationship of thoughts anddirect participation and from within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself through abdicating my responsibility to me, to that which is real as my physical practical responsibilities like self writing/blogging, chores etc. which need to be fulfilled by instead choosing to live in/as an unreal/illusion of myself made of and as energy.

reactions to energy, energy which I allow myself to define myself within and as through

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand how I exist within/as the polarity of positive and negative energetic reactions/experiences whereby from boredom and apathy energy reactions/experience which I regard as negative, I jump to the positive energy experience of me when I react in/as enthusiasm/excitement which I have towards entertainment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the thought of seeing myself seated on the couch watching TV to the positive energetic reaction/experience of enthusiasm/excitement which I then embody as myself. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the thought of seeing myself writing/blogging, doing house chores to negative energetic reactions/experiences of boredom and or apathy whereby I view my tasks as boring, difficult and time consuming. And so from within this, I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to stand from within/as the decision to will myself to change from a lazy person who only dwells in and as positive/negative energetic experiences to a person who will get done that which needs to be done, supporting myself in the realization that real practical physical responsibilities towards self is what I should focus my awareness on and not energy and that within this, I shall establish physical grounding within and as my physical body for myself and from here really walk my process of birthing myself as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to from within my imagination of wondering how my favorite TV series would unfold, reacted with great enthusiasm/excitement, which I accepted and allowed to build within me/as me and exploded the moment when I was actually watching the continuation of the series. From within me, I felt defeated within and as the imagination of my responsibilities that piled up being too much, hard and boring and so I reacted in apathy, hence from within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in apathy after imagining how difficult, boring and time consuming my actual real physical tasks were. From within this as well, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to from within and as my imagination positive or negative, created and manifested positive/negative reaction/energy experiences which I then existed within and as myself indicating that who I allow myself to exist in/as is an energetic being without real substantial living/who I am is an illusion.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand how from within and as the laziness character, within my personality system, have participated within/as reactions like apathy and boredom towards responsibilities of me for me in as my daily writing/blogging, chores, reading etc. and reactions of excitement/enthusiasm towards entertainment like watching TV or surfing the internet, whereby I choose to participate more within and as energetic experiences and disregard self responsibility like writing, chores and hence from within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regard energetic experiences of entertainment which I experience myself as when I participate within and as thoughts, imaginations and or backchats as more than self responsibility in and as the reality of self writing/blogging, doing chores etc. which is practical, physical, real and measurable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow the piling up of work/responsibilities where I end up feeling/reacting in overwhelmingness from within which I see myself as incapable of changing anything and hence react in apathy which further drives me deeper into laziness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow the ''I give up mode'' to exist within and as me from within which I react in apathy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise/sabotage myself in and as my process of self-change from a lazy person who gets very little done to a disciplined self who is consistent in getting done that which need to be done in every moment of breath so as to birth a new self as life as that which is best for all. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to see realize and understand that the reason why we have so much disregard and disrespect to all life at all levels is because I abdicate my self responsibility to and as the change that I must become which in turn will be the driving force of changing this world into a world where all life live in dignity in and as oneness and equality.


Next Blog: Day 23 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - REACTIONS DIMENSION (Self-Corrective Statements/Self Commitment) part 3

Day 21 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - REACTIONS DIMENSION part 1

Self Writing

From and as the thought of seeing tasks like self writing/blogging/chores to be difficult and or boring, my reaction would then be that of 'boredom' whereby I end up using this boredom reaction as an excuse to entertain myself. From within this as well, another reaction that is eminent is that of lack of interest/drive/lack of motivation, I become apathetic  towards the fulfillment of my priority tasks. By connecting the thought of seeing tasks like self writing/blogging/chores to be difficult and or boring to reactions of boredom and or apathy/no interest, this then becomes the energetic experiences of boredom and apathy that I accept and allow myself to become and experience myself in and as. So within this moment see clearly that I have created a relationship of thoughts and reactions to energy from within which I experience myself as energy, I choose to experience myself as energy. This is clearly self sabotage whereby I am abdicating my responsibility to me , to that which is real as my physical responsibilities which is responsibility of me towards me that need to be fulfilled but instead I choose to live as an unreal idea of myself made of/as energy.

So infact, here from within /as the thought came a reaction/s, and within/as these reaction/s is energy, energy that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify with as me therefore becoming the very reactions/energy of my thoughts. I did not stand within the decision as the directive principle to will/change myself from being a lazy person to a person that will get done that which needs to be done, I instead entertained myself, its like, entertaining myself is an automated response of 'easineness' within/as myself that immediately use as a cover-up of the fact that I am sabotaging myself from the realization that I in a given moment, is simply existing in /as an energetic experience of 'boredom/apathy' reactions.

whenever I imagined myself seated on the couch and continuing to watch my favorite series, the anticipation of what would happen next/the suspense in the series build up in me and I just couldn't wait to get to the remote. Within/from this imagination, I reacted with great enthusiasm/excitement, I could fill it build up in me and I kind of like exploded during the moment when I was actually watching the series' episode on TV. It is clear how I in a moment from within/as my imagination switched into a positive energy experience of enthusiasm from feelings/reactions of Apathy that I had toward my responsibilities/chores through/as imagining them as difficult, boring and time consuming.

I see how within and as the laziness character, within my personality system, I participate within/as reactions like Apathy and boredom towards my responsibilities and excitement/enthusiasm reactions towards entertainment, wherein it is clear that I postpone my responsibilities for another time and choose instead to exalt energetic experiences in/as entertainment. From within this, it is clear that I view/regard my responsibilities/tasks/chores/self-writing/blogging as 'less than' the energy I
experience when I participate within/as my thoughts, imaginations and or backchats, hence remaining in my laziness and get many things undone which further leads me to a reaction of overwhelmingness from all the tasks I must fulfill and from this overwhelmingness comes reactions of apathy as well where I just view the tasks as too hard/difficult to do or too much to finish and enter the 'I give up' mode.

So it is clear how I sabotage/compromise myself and my process of self change when I dwell in laziness whereby I get very little done and postpone so much. From within this as well is the fact that not taking self responsibility to change myself into a human being that stands for life as that which is best for all in/as word and deed, is what has lead to a world full of atrocities where the dignity of life has been violated in all levels. So for all this to change, for our world to embody that which is best for all in oneness and equality, I must embrace the change and be the change of bringing a world that is best for all in/as oneness and equality. this is the process of change that I must walk and laziness sabotages my commitment in/as this process.

Next Blog: Day  22 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - REACTIONS DIMENSION (Self-Forgiveness) part 2

Day 20 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - BACKCHAT DIMENSION part 3

Self Corrective/Commitment Statements  

I commit myself to, in that moment when I am faced by real life practical responsibilities like self writing or chores and I instead become aware of myself drifting into the alternate reality as my imagination and or back chats (that activate the laziness character)of having conversations in my mind in/as backchats within/as energetic experiences, I shall stop myself from participating within this through or by taking in a deep in breath and an out breath to bring myself back to physical HEREness of the moment in and as full awareness and practically will myself to physically do that which need to be done and accomplished like for example physically positioning my fingers on the keyboard and start typing in/as self writing or physically walking to the kitchen, opening the tap water and start washing dishes etc.

I commit myself to assist and support to see realize and understand that existing within/as positive or negative energies through  imaginations and/or backchats is just a polarity game that I allow and accept to participate within and hence feed the mind with energy which I again accept and allow as the experience of myself and hence from within this, I commit myself to stop participation within this polarity game that I use to remain in my laziness character and from here to physically and practically walk myself out of the positive or negative energetic experiences of myself into real physical practical doing and accomplishing all that need to be accomplished in any given moment.

I commit myself to, in any moment when I become of aware of myself participating within/as back chats in /as the alternate reality of imaginations, I shall stop myself from participating by immediately taking in a deep in breath to stabilize my awareness back to physical hereness of the moment.

I commit myself, to when I become aware of my participation within/as backchats and/or imagination, energy, I shall physically move myself through/by taking in an in breath and an out breath to move myself from the separation of self in/as mind hereness to/as the equality and oneness of/as the physical here, to position my fingers on the computer keyboard and start typing myself into/as blog or physically lifting a mop and cleaning the floor etc. within this I commit myself to when and as I see myself participating within mind and energy and not immediately moving myself as the corrective physical application/real doing to within this immediately see realize and understand that I am sabotaging/compromising myself in/as the process of standing up for myself/life and not allow any bullshit of mind and energy to distort/derail the responsibility of myself to me/my life in as the real world which is the physical.

I commit myself in and as the realization that, I over an extended period of time through the laziness character have created a relationship between energy, imagination and or backchats, had not seen realized and understood that every time/moment I gave into energy, I gave up on myself and thus ended up creating layers upon layers of energy in various dimensions /physical mind memory which has manifested into/as my entire personality system which can be/is activated during moments when I face responsibilities, give up on myself and instead participate within energy/mind through backchats and or imagination.

I commit myself to when I face resistance within self writing/self responsibilities/tasks, I shall breath and stop myself from participating within this resistance and from here assist and support myself in directing me to physically and practically walk out of energy experiences into real physical practical reality, that of physically doing/fulfilling my duties/tasks/responsibilities, for I have realized and understood that whatever moment I faced/face responsibility, gave/give up on me and gave/give into energy, I in turn create an entire personality system of me that has manifested as a physical-mind memory layer/energy layers/dimensions of and as my personality and thus, through my laziness character which is clearly an indication that I give up on me and give into energy, I end up activating this entire personality system which contributes to the resistance that I face when it comes to physically and practically walking all my tasks/responsibilities.

I commit myself to not use resistance as an excuse/scapegoat from taking responsibility , as I see that its a form of mind manipulation to not take responsibility for myself and my reality and hence I shall assist and support myself to step out of energy into real physical practical reality as the directive principle of my world for I understand that each moment I take responsibility for my practical reality is a moment I stand with me as the physical walking from energy experience into real physical practical living. Becoming alive/living in/as the physical.

Next blog - Laziness Character, Reactions dimension day 21

Day 19 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - BACKCHAT DIMENSION part 2

Self Forgiveness Statements:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in the moment where I am faced by real practical responsibilities/tasks/chores like self writing/blogging or house chores that need to be fulfilled during certain moments evade/escape/abdicate/compromise my SELF as this responsibilities when I instead create an alternate reality of myself  in/as energetic experiences in my mind through imagination and back chats that I participate within and as.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a positive energy experience within/as myself when I accept and allow myself to participate within/as imagination when imagine myself seated on the couch watching TV and relaxing which leads me into even further positive energy experiences when I participate in backchats like, I have a lot of time/watching a little TV wont hurt/I need some 'me' time before the baby wakes up .

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, through in/as the laziness character, create an energy relationship to time whereby, from my imagination of sitting on the couch with a remote in my hand end up creating backchats like, I have lots of time still, so I shall do this later or like I am a last minute person and so from within this, it is evident that I am compromising myself and my self responsibility by participating and dwelling in/as the mind through imagination and backchats thus creating and experiencing myself as just energy and not real substantial reality of self writing by placing my hands on keyboard and typing.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand how I end up generating negative energy towards my responsibilities in regards to time in/as the mind when I participate within/as back chats of oh shit, now I don't have time to do and finish my responsibilities or now I am tired or it is too late to do this now/today so ill do this tomorrow where in the end I accept myself as this negative energy and my negative energetic experiences thereof and thus end up remaining in the same spot as the experience of me instead of changing me by physically and practically getting things done that need to be done and on time hence walking effectively from the laziness character to effective living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, from within/as my imagination and backchats, jump/go from positive energetic experience within/as myself when I imagine of that which I want to do like watching TV which is further fueled with positive energy through backchats like I need some me time/watching a little TV wont hurt/I am a last minute person, I work best under pressure, to the exact opposite negative energetic experiences whereby I imagine how difficult/boring my responsibilities/chores/tasks are which as well is further fueled by more negative energy from back chats like ill do this later/I have too much to do now that I have a child and all this is just an energy polarity game which I accept and allow myself to exist within/as through my participation in these imaginations and back chats.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in my laziness character exist within and as both the positive and negative energetic experiences simultaneously through imaginations and back chats that occur 'simultaneously' , For instance when I have a positive imagination experience of watching TV and negative energetic experience of a backchat towards tasks of myself that I must fulfill by finding them boring or too difficult all existing as words of one sentence in my mind which is like: I am going to watch some TV right now as self writing/blogging is too difficult or boring and thus in this, I end up choosing doing that which fulfills my positive energy experience (though not necessary) and discarding that which gives me negative energetic experiences even though it supports me to self realize in the long run, this is purely self sabotage and leads me to remain in the laziness character, so from this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise my self as process/the decision by fulfilling just my wants and pushing that which needs to be done like self writing to the side to do later/postpone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted myself to not see, realize and understand that, by accepting and allowing me to exist in and as this relationship of self to energy as imagination and backchats is just self sabotage/self compromise in that I choose to remain unreal as just an energetic experience rather than be Here in and as the Physical which is real and measurable through participating and walking the whole process of practically getting done all that needs to be done in order to assist and support myself birth myself as life from the physical and bring about a world that is best for all through leading an exemplary life of/as that which is best for all in every moment of breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use resistance as an excuse and justification to sabotage/compromise responsibility towards me by giving in to energy and energetic experiences thereof and giving up on me and my SELF responsibility towards/as my very living.

Self Corrective/Commitment Statements in my next blog, DAY 20

 

Day 18 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - BACKCHAT DIMENSION part 1

Writing:

Here I am writing out the internal conversations/voices in my head/backchats that come up when I am about or during the activation of the laziness character within me, during or after participating within thoughts/images/pictures or imaginations of watching TV, doing house chores, self writing/blogging etc.

• I shall do this later
• I have lots of time/I still have time
• Watching a little TV wont hurt
• I need some 'me' time
• I am tired
• I am bored so let me entertain myself through TV or browsing the net or watching a movie or a series
• I shall blog/do house chores soon after I finish watching this programme/movie/series
• I shall write tomorrow, now its late
• I have too much to do now that I have a child
• I am a last minute person/I work best under pressure
• This is my last episode of this series, after this, I shall do house chores/write a blog

 

I see how I accept and allow myself to in the moment when I am faced by real practical responsibilities/tasks/chores that need to be fulfilled, I evade/escape/abdicate/compromise this self responsibility when I instead create an alternate reality of myself in my mind through imagination and back chats, a reality that isn't real at all where I experience myself only as energy.

 

I see how I create a positive energy experience within/as myself when I accept and allow myself to participate within/as imagination when imagine myself seated on the couch watching TV and relaxing which leads me into even further positive energy experiences when I participate in backchats like, I have a lot of time/watching a little TV wont hurt/I need some 'me' time before the baby wakes up .

 

I see how I have accepted and allowed myself to, through/in the laziness character, create an energy relationship to time whereby, from my imagination of sitting on the couch with a remote in my hand end up creating backchats like, I have lots of time still, so I shall do this later or like I am a last minute person and so from within this, it is evident that I am compromising myself and my self responsibility by participating and dwelling in/as the mind through imagination and backchats thus creating and experiencing myself as just energy and not real substantial reality of like self writing by placing my hands on keyboard and typing. From this as well I see how I end up generating negative energy towards my responsibilities in regards to time in/as the mind when I within/as back chats of like oh shit, now I don't have time to do and finish my responsibilities or now I am tired or it is too late to do this now/today so ill do this tomorrow where in the end I accept myself as this negative energy and my negative energetic experiences thereof.

 

I as well see how, from within/as my imagination and backchats, jump/go from positive energetic experience within/as myself when I imagine of that which I want to do like watching TV which is further fueled with more positive energy through backchats like I need some me time/watching a little TV wont hurt/I am a last minute person, I work best under pressure, to the exact opposite negative energetic experiences whereby I imagine how difficult/boring my responsibilities/chores/tasks are which as well is further fueled by more negative energy from back chats like ill do this later/I have too much to do now that I have a child and all this is just an energy polarity game which I accept and allow myself to exist within/as through my participation.

 

Existent within the laziness character as my imagination and backchats is when I participate and hence experience myself within/as both positive and negative energetic experiences simultaneously. For instance when I have a positive imagination experience of watching TV and negative energetic experience of a backchat towards tasks of myself that I must fulfill by finding them boring or too difficult and hence the words as a sentence in my mind is: I am going to watch some TV right now as self writing/blogging is too difficult or boring and thus in this, I end up choosing doing that which fulfills my positive energy experience (though not necessary) and discarding that which gives me negative energetic experiences even though it supports me to self realize in the long run, this is purely self sabotage and leads me to remain in the laziness character.

 

I see that, by accepting and allowing me to exist in and as this relationship of self to energy, imagination and backchats is just self sabotage/self compromise in that I choose to remain unreal as just an energetic experience rather than be Here in and as the Physical which is real and measurable through participating and walking the whole process of practically getting done all that needs to be done in order to assist and support myself birth myself as life from the physical and bring about a world that is best for all through leading an exemplary life of/as that which is best for all in every moment of breath.

 

Self Forgiveness in my Next blog, day 19 

Day 17 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - IMAGINATION DIMENSION

Self Corrective/Commitment Statements.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself activating the laziness character through imagination, that occurs when I am imagining scenarios in my mind which in most cases have nothing to do with current reality that I am facing rather than seeing what is right Here in front of me as real physical reality of things that need to be practically done and finished, I shall stop/will myself not to participate in imagination through taking a deep in breath and an out breath and physically start doing that which need to be done like physically walking to the kitchen, opening tap water and begin washing dishes  or physically placing my fingers on the keyboard and start writing my blog etc. within this, I also commit myself to always be the directive principle in each task/responsibility within and as breath in each moment.

 

I see realize and understand that, I have tasks/duties/chores/responsibilities that I must fulfill during each day like self writing/blogging/house chores etc. before I engage in doing other activities that do not require necessity to be fulfilled (which are actually my wants) like watching TV , surfing the net etc. and so in this, I COMMIT myself to ensure that I dedicatedly work on and finish all my daily required responsibilities/tasks/chores/duties instead of imagining them done/doing them in my mind but not real physical doing, before I engage in my wants.

 

I commit myself to not exist within or participate within the imagination that fuels the laziness character within me, and that any moment I find myself existing or participating within imagination, I top, I breath to stabilize myself and I delete this imaginations or simply choose not to participate.

 

I see, realize and understand that participating within/as imagination, I am actually creating positive energy through imagining my wants like watching TV as entertaining or negative energies through imagining my responsibilities as boring/difficult, which is just a polarity game whereby I end up feeding the mind with these energies hence fueling it  even more to direct me instead of being/willing myself to be the directive principle in and as my life and thus, I COMMIT myself to in/as the process of going from laziness to self commitment/self discipline/self consistency, so as to not deliberately sabotage /compromise myself in and as my practical reality responsibilities for energy/energetic experiences that just lead me into  and as separation from myself in and as my physical world.

 

I commit myself to not allow responsibilities/tasks/chores to pile up through postponement which I do when I imagine change instead of actually practically physically changing through physically doing and finishing all that requires to be done, thus no laziness.

 

I commit myself to utilize imagination into only as living practical support when I need to plan/map out how I can practically walk and fulfill all that requires to be done like self writing/blogging, house chores etc. till done.

 

I commit myself to put/have responsibility towards mySELF/my world/reality and not energy/energetic experiences/desires/wants

 

I commit myself to not imagine change, but to practically walk the process of practical physical change as the change itself so as to change the current lazy me into a new me that is dedicated and discipline and consistent in living an exemplary life as the directive principle of that which is best for all.

 

Day 16 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - IMAGINATION DIMENSION

Self Forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to further enter into imagination from thought when I am faced by a task/duty/responsibility that I must fulfill hence remaining in my laziness character.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine that certain tasks are long/boring/hard to fulfill before I even attempt to do them and in this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid doing the tasks/chores etc. or do them without dedication/discipline in and as the directive principle as myself, hence not to my utmost potential.   

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as imagination that fuel the laziness character within me as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within imagination that fuel the laziness character within me as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to see realize and understand how I play the game of energy in each polarity when I imagine how certain tasks/responsibilities like self writing/house chores will take so much time, or that they are difficult to do or that they are boring which in turn lead me to negative energetic experiences of/as myself and positive energetic experience of myself when and as I imagine myself within the doing of entertaining stuff like watching TV/movie/surfing the net/skyping etc.

within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to base the reality of who I am/my identity as the energetic experiences that I participate in and as my mind instead of sticking to  reality by breathing and do and finish all things that need to be done and finished..

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage my self responsibility towards myself and my world/reality by participating within energy games through my imagination, which further lead me into laziness that hinder me from making progress of my goal which is that of birthing myself through and as the physical and ensuring a world that is best for all becomes the reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within my imagination create a negative energetic experience of myself during and when I am faced with tasks/chores/responsibilities that I am required to practically fulfill because of my resistance towards them. In this as well, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within my imagination create positive energetic experiences to things that I like doing, things I want to do that are not necessarily required of me to practically fulfill because they are what's best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to escape from my reality into imagination when am faced with the fulfilling of tasks that will support me in my process of birthing myself as life from the physical like daily self writing/house chores etc. which I have allowed now to pile up to the point where I feel overwhelmed. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to utilize my imagination into living practical support by using it to plan/map out on how I can practically walk and fulfill my daily tasks/chores/responsibilities till they are all done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put energetic experiences/desires/wants ahead of responsibility towards myself and my world/reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to see realize and understand that I can not imagine change, but that I must practically become the change by walking as the change and that, if I dwell in laziness, I can not change the current me/self through practically walking that which is required of me to change (self writing, self forgiveness) and become a new me/self that actually lives an exemplary life as that which is best for all.

Self Corrective Statements: In my next Blog

 

Day 15 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - IMAGINATION DIMENSION

Self Writing.

''....with IMAGINING change and not immediately in the moment implementing it, we’re inadvertently actually generating more energy for the Mind/Personalities and so make CHANGE difficult for ourselves, because we’ve given the MIND the necessary energy/resources to be able to manipulate ourselves in a moment into/as ENERGY-EXPERIENCE, instead of practical, self-aware, living.'' -Sinette Spies, Heavens Journey to life day 165


Usually this is a dimension that happens so fast just after I engage in and as thinking. Immediately after imagination, I have noticed that I immediately start participating in backchats but this is usually also very fast and it at times seemed difficult to separate these dimensions. Here is what I imagine myself doing/becoming that activate the laziness character in and as myself;

''I imagine myself lying on the couch with the remote on my hand and a snack on a plate, feeling comfortable watching my 'favorite' series/continuing watching my 'favorite' series/a movie etc.''

''After I am done watching TV/movie/series, I tend to go into imagination on how I would have liked the movie to end or I engage in my imagination on what happens next/the suspense''

''I also imagine myself seated/dancing to my 'favorite' tune/song''

''I do as well imagine how I am going to do my tasks like self writing/blogging, how I shall do my house chores or make Vlogs or learn Photoshop.''  I would like to make a note on this point that I usually do not end/never ended up sticking to doing these tasks, I just imagined myself doing them but I end up not doing most of them.

My preference was more to the entertainment part where I entertained myself/mind for long hours and hence ended up doing very few of the tasks that I saw as less entertaining. In this it was obvious to me that at the end of each day, after engaging/indulging myself in and as the positive/ entertaining stuff that I imagined about, I went into the exact opposite of experience where I became sad/felt guilty/lazy for not having fulfilled myself as the tasks that were of value in terms of supporting me/myself realize myself. So this was an energy game, polarity,where id feel good/positive during my fulfillment of my imaginations and negative/bad feelings as I did not do/walk the important tasks for self support. this was a physical consequence of my imagination i.e., it felt good to imagine but the physical consequences were negative/bad feelings and having my tasks/responsibilities pile up to a point where I felt that they were too overwhelming.

I did not live the imagination as practical support for myself to map out the tasks to be done, how I shall go about in doing them and actually doing then till they are all done.

Within this as well, I see how I created change as self in the mind creating more energy for the mind/force as self to thrive and when I was faced with the actual change in a given moment, I as Self Here did not walk through into becoming the actual Change.

I would like to do away with my Old Self that likes to dwell in laziness and imagining change but actually never changes , only energizing the mind more and more. Creating/becoming a NEW me/SELF I know must take determination, dedication, discipline and consistency. To change Self I must walk my day here and as each breath, making the change immediate/instant as the actual doing.

 

SELF FORGIVENESS: In my next blog.

 

Day 14 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - THOUGHT DIMENSION - Self Corrective Statements

 

Here, I  realize that, engaging myself in the act of thinking before doing a task actually leads to the eventuality of me not doing the task at all for example self writing or other responsibilities. within this I see and realize that decisions are not made just by thinking but by actually walking the decision instantly as self, I understand that my SELF should be the decision that I must walk in every moment of breath and thus, I COMMIT myself to walk a decision as myself and in this context, walk the process of self writing as myself and not just as a thought in the form of an image in my mind.

 

I realize that using TV or any other forms of self entertainment  methods is just a way I escape the reality of facing myself and taking responsibility of myself/life which in turn leads to wasting time/breaths, this way, I end up not doing self writing or other tasks and thus remain in the laziness character. Thus, I COMMIT myself to, when I am faced with self writing or doing other tasks like house chores and a thought in the form of an image pop up in my mind in which I see myself  engaging in entertainment (TV browsing the net etc.), I stop, Breath and delete the image/thought/picture and bring myself back to the moment/here and walk a task like self writing/blog, chores  through to completion.

 

 I commit myself to no longer use thoughts as image/picture presentations in my mind as excuses tocharacter.
remain in the laziness

 

I see and realize that there exists a polarity within my laziness character whereby I have developed a liking towards things that I find entertaining like watching TV and hence judged them as positive/good/relaxing and hence have developed a tendency of doing them more often, whereas when it comes to tasks like self writing/blogging, doing house chores, I have developed less liking towards them and have judged this tasks as negative/less enjoyable in comparison to entertainment. I thus COMMIT myself to stop judging/seeing self writing/blogging, doing house chores, entertainment like watching TV, browsing the net etc. in the context of polarity as positive or negative as projected through the eye of the mind but rather participate within self writing/blogging, doing house chores, going out for a walk, entertainment/ watching TV etc. in accordance to that which is best for all in any given moment, to prioritize my tasks in such a way that in a given moment, whatever I do in fact supports life as that which is best for all.

 

 I COMMIT myself to stopping the cycle of the energy highs and lows of superiority/inferiority (in regards to the laziness character) that I accept and allow to experience within and as myself.

 

I realize that I have developed a tendency whereby I tend to do most tasks as a last minute resort and in this I tend to rush through a given task and hence I end up not exercising my at most potential in doing the task and that most of the times I am not here physically as the directive principle but rather I do the task for the sake of finishing it. within this I COMMIT myself to utilize my time efficiently by prioritizing, planning and practicing doing different tasks at a given moment, allocating enough time to each task so I don't have to rush. I COMMIT myself to doing each of my tasks with dedication ensuring that in each moment within a task I am fully aware and Here as the directive principle and not my mind rushing to finish. I COMMIT myself to stop  and stabilize myself through breathing whenever I am about to rush through a given task like self writing, doing house chores, going for a walk etc. and instead do the task step by step breath by breath each moment fully aware of who I am as the directive principle.

 

I COMMIT myself to, when and as I see myself about to participate in thoughts as pictures/images within my mind in which I see myself doing other things other than the task which I should be doing in a particular given moment, I stop, breath and realize that I am about to activate the laziness character within me and hence I shall stop participation/delete these thoughts/pictures/images and focus on walking the practical steps of the task at hand through to completion.

Next blog: Laziness Character - back chat dimension.

 

Day 13 - LAZINESS CHARACTER - THOUGHT DIMENSION - Self Forgiveness.

''As we have walked:

Thoughts: Would manifest as only an Image/Picture/Memory – really like a ‘photograph’ in one’s Mind that is manifested with a positive, negative or neutral resonance to it, and can stand as an activation-‘chip’ for specific Characters/Personalities. (We will in time to come explain the ‘neutrality’ of/as the Mind, in how it utilize the relationships between the negative, neutral and positive within the context of Thought to see-saw us in the Mind within/between energies and energy-experiences. For the moment, we have walked the relationships between the negative, neutral and positive, from DAY 6 onwards.)

Imagination: Will manifest as a scene/play out – essentially, equal to ‘daydreaming’, where one would envision a scene/play out in one’s Mind that is the complete opposite to what one is doing/being here in actual, real physical reality.

Backchat/Internal Conversations: Will manifest as words, sentences, statements in one’s Mind that activate together with specific Characters/Personalities or sub characters/personalities''.-Sunette Spies

Prior to writing this blog, I mean literally moments before, I was experiencing lots of resistance, lots of back chats and so in this blog, I shall walk all this dimensions that I have become/exist as the Laziness Character. I play out the laziness character whenever i am faced with the point of doing self writing. Sometimes physical activities/responsibilities as well.

I am now going to deconstruct this character starting with the Thought Dimension through writing here the various pictures/images that pop up into my mind whenever am faced with the task of self writing or at times some physical activities.

• An image of myself seated on the couch watching TV/my favorite series

• An image of myself actually sitting and writing myself or doing a certain task
• An image of seeing tasks like self writing/blogging/chores as difficult and or boring as compared to entertainment.

• An image of myself browsing through the net instead of self writing

• Seeing a task as something which will take a long time to finish and hence I don't begin at all/lose interest.

• seeing myself rushing through a task so that I can go back to entertaining myself in and as mind.

• An image of myself rushing through a task  in a limited time frame hence I end up rushing in the doing of the actual task.

SELF-FORGIVENESS:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow the thought as an image of myself seated on the couch watching TV/my favorite series to engage my focus instead of focusing myself in doing self writing or other tasks.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use TV or any other form 'entertainment' as an escape from myself doing that what is in fact best for all and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let myself/my life revolve around entertaining myself and hence leading to lots of time wasting instead of realizing and understanding that this is a mechanism that I use to remain in the laziness character and not become the change as that which is best for all life.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the thoughts as images of myself seated and self writing through typing which I immediately whisk away saying that 'its too difficult' is just another excuse I use to remain in my laziness character.

 

Within this, I  forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge/view myself within and as self writing as a difficult/hard/bad task while existing as well in the opposite polarity by judging /viewing myself within and as entertainment as easy/good/relaxing task and in this I thus forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within  and as the polarity that comes with the laziness character that I play out.

 

During entertainment (TV, Internet, time with family and  or friends), I experience positive/good feelings and hence I feel superior to entertainment but I view/see/judge self writing or other physical tasks as difficult/hard/boring and within this I experience the feelings of inferiority/not good enough to tackle such tasks and therefore, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not to see realise and understand that this is still a polarity game I play within my laziness character whereby I embody the the energy highs and lows of the mind  and hence ultimately I keep on experiencing and accepting this cycle of highs and lows of energy as myself. Time to break this cycle.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as the thought of an image of myself rushing through a task in a limited time and thus end up rushing myself in the actual doing of the task and by so doing, I don't do it to my utmost potential. most of the times in this, I am usually not aware of myself as all the physical movements in doing the task but rather I exist in mind backchats of doing the task just for the sake of finishing it, and thus get back to my entertainment as soon as possible. Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in the polarities of negative energy by judging my tasks/responsibilities as a nu incense/bugging/negative whereas the entertainment part gives me a rush of good/positive/relaxing energy experience.

 

I shall continue with self corrective statements in my next blog.